Some reflections on Motherhood by Madeline Labriola
Westerly Sun May 17, 2023 I grew up in the 1950s assuming I would marry, have children, and live happily ever after. Fast forward to 2023. I have five children, 11 grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. I fulfilled the expectations of my generation! Motherhood has been a journey of joy and sadness. The moment I held my newborn son I felt an overwhelming love. I vowed to keep him safe, healthy and completely loved. I didn’t worry if my children were safe walking home, buying candy at the neighborhood store or jogging on a residential street. In our small town in the Hudson Valley in New York I trusted the school, coaches, Scout leaders, clergy, and police. There were no active-shooter drills foreshadowing violence in school or social media. Like all mothers I was apprehensive about them as they grew into teenagers, started driving, dating, and craving independence. The joy of being a mother can very quickly turn to sadness and fear as we watch a son or daughter struggle. In my case, when they got into trouble, a loving family and a strong community protected and embraced them. On Mother’s Day I realize how fortunate and insulated I was from the reality of motherhood for millions of American women who didn’t share my privileges. Many mothers worry that the outside world will harm their children instead of enfolding and protecting them. When George Floyd and Tyre Nichols called for their mothers with their last breath, I could only sob in anguish. Tragically, their mother’s love was not enough to save them from such brutality. Black, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) mothers worry about their children in ways I never did. Will the world see them as part of a community or see them as threats? Will they be subjected to racial profiling that contributes to the incarceration of one in three Black men? Our police departments have many fine officers, but it is fair to note that even the best officers operate in a system that disproportionately impacts Black people. Several friends have shared with me stories about “the talk.” Black moms must explain racism to their children and advise them how to act if stopped by the police. There is no guarantee of their safety even if they follow these instructions. Ruby Bridges became the first African American child to integrate an all-white school in the South in 1960. Her mother was frantic with worry as her 6-year-old was routinely tormented on her way to school. Her mother feared for her life as people threatened to poison Ruby. White adults removed their children from school, and Ruby sat alone in a classroom for a year. The Civil Rights movement focused on the blatant racism in our educational system. Westerly is not the 1950s segregated South, but we are not immune to the impact of systemic racism. Our school population is 20% BIPOC. It would be naive to believe that racism does not impact Westerly. As our demographics shift will we be brave enough to reflect on the realities of this change? Will we be willing to educate ourselves and fix any discriminatory practices? Will we have the courage to establish equity within our systems to help all Westerly citizens? Unless we are brave enough to honor and protect all children from long-held prejudices and false beliefs, none of our children will receive an equitable education. Will we have the compassion to consider the worried mother whose children are bullied, ignored or discounted because of their color? No mother wants her children to arrive home from school traumatized. We have yet to learn how to adequately handle microaggressions and racial incidents that seem subtle, but wound deeply. I am confident that the people of our community will accept the challenges ahead, work together, lead with love and compassion as we support and create a future where every child is safe, healthy, and completely loved. To be a mother is a universal joy. I am thankful for my children and my life. At the same time, I must acknowledge the facts about the lives of many BIPOC mothers. We share the same love, hopes and dreams for our children. I pray that someday every mother will safely give birth to children who will be raised in a safe and loving world, regardless of color. As a member of the Westerly Anti-Racism Coalition, I passionately dedicate myself to advancing the dignity of every mother’s child through education, speaking the truth and standing up for justice. I invite you to join the conversations of many mothers (and fathers) at ARC’s Sunday gatherings, and plan to join our fun, family celebration of Juneteenth next month. Find all the details on our website. This column is written by members of the Westerly Anti-Racism Coalition, which embraces multiculturalism to address racism. Geoff Serra is a contributing editor. ARC meets on the steps of the Westerly Post Office each Sunday, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. All are welcome. Learn more and subscribe to ARC’s newsletter at westerlyarc.weebly.com. Contact them at [email protected]. |
Details
Archives
March 2024
This website is a publication of the Westerly Anti-Racism Coalition. ARC is a community coalition unaffiliated with any state, national, or international organization. ARC embraces multiculturalism to address racism.
|